I do believe I’ve touched on this before and have admitted that the blog has… well, it hasn’t run off the rails… more like it ended up on another track at the switching station. Well, I believe that we’re at the next switching station and it’s time to re-join the original track. Partially inspired by Bob’s post on his discovery of being a writer (thanks brother), and partially finally kicking MYSELF in the ass to make something happen in terms of the book I began to write oh so many months ago….
Before I began to write this book, life had taken a downward turn. Now it wasn’t all doom and gloom with loss of family or serious health complications, but I had been in a rut in terms of self image and it was time to change things for the good.
My original purpose for writing this book was to help myself develop my perceived Poor Self Image (PSI) into a GREAT Self Image (GSI) and the best way to learn is to teach. I came with the idea that in order to cure my PSI, writing a book about the land mines we have all faced throughout our lives (have been completely unaware of), would be the best way to do this.
The challenge with this I quickly discovered was that I had to maintain a PSI in order to be ‘someone with a PSI, writing a book to later travel and teach about it! I would actually have to maintain a PSI in order to be such an author. After realizing this, and realizing that I couldn’t actually help anyone deal with their PSI if I didn’t help myself, I quickly had to change the image I had of myself.
So here is the catch, I had a perceived PSI and yet was on a path of discovery to understand and improve this. I needed to write this book, but my current PSI was not congruent of someone who COULD write this book. Quite the predicament I seemed to have gotten myself into.
If you had the image of someone who has a PSI trying to write a book to solve your ‘problems’, are you not in fact propagating your own PSI? Sure, I could maintain the self image of someone who is overcoming their poor self image and will have a great self image by the time the book is finished – but wouldn’t it be faster to actually start with a great self image? Would the self image of one who is an educator, writing a book to help others to be used as gateway for a path of speaking and teaching not a better self image?
I guess this is the entire point of the whole book: be aware.
Something as simple as writing a book from the perspective of someone with a PSI, would on the outside seem like a great idea, however, to do it one would have to maintain the image of someone with a PSI. Something so innocent is in fact detrimental to helping understand and change a PSI. So when I say ‘be aware’ I mean exactly that – you have unknowingly wandered into the middle of a mine field and NOW you are aware of it. At this point you don’t know how big it is, how many mines are there, who put them there (or who allowed them to be put there), let alone how to get out without loosing something, and likely, something important!
The first ‘smack upside the head’ and the catalyst for this entire book came when I heard the phrase “Treat others like you would like to be treated”. You’ve likely heard it quite a bit as it is the proverbial ‘Golden Rule’ taught to us as children and brought back time and time again to reinforce a point of relating to others (and be nice damn it!).
The reality is that this simple phrase is the biggest load of crap and quite possibly the worst thing you could ever, believe, preach, or even teach to someone else.
If you did not have an ideal self image, and in fact had a PSI, and held to the belief that you should treat everyone as you would like to be treated, how would you go about treating others? Does someone with a poor self image expect to be treated like the unique and talented individual they actually are? If not, how are they likely to treat others? Does ANYONE win at this point, and does this not propagate the whole challenge with PSI?
Starts to make you wonder what other little statements which SEEM like good advice are actually detrimental to your self image, doesn’t it? We won’t dive deeply into this part right now as future posts (and Chapter 2) will deal with the specifics, however, it is just simply good to be aware of these statements as we move forward.
Ok, so there we have the first post of a blog back on track. It’s a bit rough around the edges still as it was part of a larger concept that I worked on a while back, however, the point is that a step has been taken. *whew* Ok, what’s next? Oh, right, step 2.. 3…. 4…. … 😉
Photo by Andrew Pescod