Frustrated While Frustrating Over Frustration

Ok, I’m not 100% sure that ‘Frustrating’ can be used as a verb, but hey, it’s better to make up easily accepted and potentially useful words than put the effort into finding out I’m wrong, right?

Frustration is one of those funny little emotions which we find in the grey area between anger, confusion, annoyance, and complete dumbfoundedness, yet still in close proximity to that feeling you get just before you burst out laughing like a complete lunatic…

If we were to consult the all-knowing oracle Google for a definition (internet confused: you can use “define:word” in Google to search for definitions), it would appear that the rest of the world isn’t too sure either:

When a planet applying to an aspect is deflected by a third before the aspect is complete, it is described as having been frustrated.” – from the glossary

The feelings, thoughts, and behaviors associated with not achieving a particular goal or the belief that a goal has been prematurely interrupted.” – from the dictionary

or my personal favorite

When you start tearing your hair out after something that has gone wrong!” – from the glossary

The challenge with frustration is that it is an emotion, it’s generally brought about by an external source, yet you are the one left to deal with it, rationalize it, and put things into perspective when you are least equiped to do so.

Know what the donkey’s name is that frustration rides into town on? Complaining. Sadly, the act of complaining when frustrated always seems like a great idea at the time, yet it’s too easily done. At first it seems like a great way to get something off your chest – sort of a ‘cleanse the soul’ type act – yet all it ever does is bring up a fresh level of frustration now that everything is fresh and clear again in your mind.

Currently I’m in the middle of an incredibly frustrating situation (as if you couldn’t tell…) with a potential new job. See, 4 weeks ago I was hired for a position, I was supposed to start over two weeks ago, yet at this point everything has been delayed due to ‘policy and procedure’ (which REALLY don’t apply here), and my actual start date is completely unknown… Frustrating? Yes – but wait – to take this job I have decided to downscale my freelance web stuff and turned down another opportunity which pre-dated this current job… The further frustration is that I began to downscale the freelance stuff in anticipation of the original start date, which means that by the time I get a new client to fill the missing gap – I’ll likely be starting. It’s just pure madness.

This whole thing falls into various risk vs. reward categories, and the decisions that have been made on this end have not been made lightly, by any means. Frustrating? Well, yeah – actually, it’s frustrating enough to blog about! Where it gets tricky is that family and friends are somewhat aware of what is going on, yet each conversation requires brining it up again and updating them. I get the fact that they care. I get the fact that they’re concerned. Does anyone get the fact that someone is actually living this, trying to deal with it on a daily (sometimes hourly) basis, and to keep bringing it up fresh is a bit taxing both mentally and physically?

I’m sure they do, but we forget, don’t we? What we also sometimes forget is that when we ‘vent’, complain, or whatever, about what is frustrating us, people have the tendancy to try and help. What we typically get is opinion based purely on your side of the story, influenced by their situation,  combined with their understanding of your situation, with a mix of various emotions surrounding the whole thing… Generally not the greatest bit of stuff coming your way.

Do we get good advice? Sure, every now and then we get a good nugget of good advice thrown into the mix – yet if you’re not in a good frame of mind (due to a recent re-hashing of that which is causing frustration), there is the chance it might get missed. Now, if you go out and SEEK advice, well, that is a different game all together! Just watch out for family advice due to protective natures and the emotions that could come with it..

So what do you do, right? Well, I have no idea. My guess would be to learn from it – but other than that…

What are we currently learning (by force)?

Patience (and a hint of restraint too). 😉

Photo by: by WarzauWynn